Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
