Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
did i walk over a car last night?
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
