I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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