Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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