she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
