I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Randomize
