How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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