Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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