If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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