I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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