So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Randomize
