OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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