If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I want to fling myself into the sun
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
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