last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Randomize
