I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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