There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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