If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
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