remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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