I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Send help, water and tortillas.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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