The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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