:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
