Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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