I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Randomize
