Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Randomize
