The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
