i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
im drinking this country out of the recession.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
