A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
We left the knife in your bed.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
