On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
