i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Someone stole a lamp last night.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
