it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize
