There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
