R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Randomize
