white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
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