My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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