i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
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