I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize