Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
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