At least make sure they are 18
Why
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
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