Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
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