He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Randomize