I like my sex mixed with concussions.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
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