I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Just pee around me
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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