I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Hippo gnu deer
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Randomize
