Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
