I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
