I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Randomize
