Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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