Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Randomize
