But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
I'm like, not good at living.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
