hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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